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Jamie Oliver campaigns for healthy alternatives to salt for icy roads
TV Chef Jamie Oliver has called for the government to introduce healthier alternatives to salt on the UK’s roads. Speaking at the launch of his new campaign, he said it was a ‘crying shame’ that the...
View ArticleTown complains at being largely unaffected by snow
Residents of St Albans are furious the town has been largely unaffected by the recent spell of heavy snow. According to local residents, the roads have stayed clear, the schools remain open, and there...
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New Scottish minister for transport promises plentiful snow stocks this winter
The new Scottish minister for transport and infrastructure, Keith Brown, has been quick reassure the Scottish people that supplies of snow are sufficient to see them through the festive period. ‘My...
View ArticleGovernment to spend hundreds of millions on snowploughs “to jinx it”
The government intends to invest hundreds of millions of pounds on snowploughs, gritters and salt supplies in a bid to “jinx” the chances of Britain experiencing another rough winter, it emerged this...
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NewsBiscuit weather supplement: So what exactly is this ‘snow’?
Meteorologists didn’t see it coming. Weathermen deny it. Transport planners are baffled by it. Drivers live in fear of it. Until yesterday, nobody had heard of it. It’s called ‘snow’. But, amazingly,...
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Ice-fall woman, 90, accused of diving by off-duty referee
The Football Association has refused pensioner Edith Perkins the right of appeal against a straight red card shown to her by off-duty football referee Ron Withenshaw yesterday. The incident occurred...
View ArticleWaitrose carrot refusing to be used as snowman’s nose
A carrot from Waitrose is desperately trying to avoid spending the rest of the week outside in the cold being used as a nose for an as-yet-unbuilt snowman. ‘I heard the weather forecast on the radio...
View ArticleOutbreaks of smugness from 4×4 owners forecast
With Britain in the grip of a Siberian weather front, some councils have issued a yellow alert for smugness from drivers of 4×4 vehicles. Forecasters have revealed that drivers of Chelsea tractors who...
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